Life as we know it

Hello My beautifuls well as most of you know life has become quite trying for me and my little family with our high risk pregnancy. It seems i have sevral blood clots behind my placenta and my cervix are not doing so great either :( Im 16 weeks on saturday so everyday is looking better and better it is a very trying time for me and its so hard to focus on the stuff i need to as i keep thinking what? Stay tuned for more info on our little Twister i have a scan on the 7th one question i guess is why cant i love my unborn baby im scared to:(

Now to Sis aka Charlotte......... Charlotte is doing so well in alot of things but struggling in others last weeek we had to pull her out of day care cos she was just way to destressed:( She seems to be going through the mummy girl bit again and its kinda annoying that if i need to pee she needs to come lol....Her talking has developed alot since we have moved house although most people may not understand her that aint in her everyday life but we get what she is saying She can now tell us what she wants juice bikky etc and oh a new one is ooooo pooo :) charming Miss Charlotte her sleepy has gone done hill since we have moved will only sleep in her cot for a few hours of a night then into bed with me so this is a big thing we need to work on with her and she knows it:)

Now to me dealing with my dear baby sisters death....Its still killing me i cry every night for her and especially for her little man that wil never know his mummy:( The driver is still roaming free out drinking and carrying on like she has done nothing wrong hello you killed her..........I think once she has been to court and has been sent to jail (hopefully) that things will start to look better for me theres just some days i think its all a dream and i go to pick the phone up to call her and see how she is doing hmmm not gunna happen some days i just dont wanna face the fact that she is gone but if i keep putting it off i guess it will never seeem real she will always have a spot in my heart and ill never forget her:)

So i guess thats about all i can say about life right now although there is alot going on i dont want to bore you all with my issues....I dont know what i would do with a few people on facebook that have helped me through al this hard time and they know who they are i love u guys big xxxxx